thanks, XKCD!

I have an unusual hatred for (and difficulty with) the practice of filling out forms.  Seriously, I’ll dwell on the one or two bits of almost any form that could be interpreted in an ambiguous manner for an inordinate amount of time.  When I’m done, I usually half-expect to be yelled at or misinterpreted for screwing it all up.  Whether it’s a rental application form, a DMV form, or a form at my doctor’s office, I’ll always find something that doesn’t quite seem to work right.

On an unrelated note, I also have no desire to serve on a jury.  For the four-plus years that I’ve lived in DC, I’ve been fortunate to only be summoned for service on a grand jury in Federal court.  In those two cases, I was able to successfully (and legitimately) petition the court for a waiver of service.  DC Superior Court, however, does not allow you to avoid service.  Consequently, in late September, I have to show up for jury duty.

In order to be fully registered, however, guess what I have to do?  That’s right!  I have to fill out a form!  Now typically, my problems with forms are somewhat esoteric…  maybe a field doesn’t apply to me, maybe I have more answers than a form has space… whatever.  But in DC’s case, the questionable part of the form is right there on its face: it asks for my email address… twice.  Twice, DC?  Really?  I mean, I looked over the form… the fields for entering your email address show up in two different places… maybe one is somebody else’s email address?  Doesn’t seem that way.

But who would be so silly… who would lack the proofreading skill… who would be so gratuitously wasteful as to ask for the same information twice?  Ah, that’s right… that’s DC!  I don’t know what the city is up to here, but I’m entering my email address twice… just in case.

The folks at Gawker got their hands on a copy of the blueprints for the Real World DC house and posted pictures of ‘em for everyone to see. So if you’re planning to stalk keep a watchful eye upon the house, you’re in luck!  My only comment:  “love sacks?”  … eek!  (and they’ll be in the rotunda windows, right on the corner)…

(Image courtesy Fox5 / DCist)

(screenshot from Metro's Rail Alerts website)

I’m sure the WMATA folks had a number of higher priorities than making sure their website gave sufficiently detailed descriptions of service delays this evening. Nevertheless, there is something a little incongruous about the description given (a description that was live on the site until at least 7:30). That said, I’ve seen enough Metro incident reports to be sufficiently jaded to say,”sounds like a derailment” when one of my coworkers informed my project of the situation by reading this description. Unfortunately, that assessment was all too correct…

The cameras are on my neighborhood this weekend as several projects are shooting in this area.  Across the street, filming of The Real World DC kicks off this weekend.  I’m verrrry skeptical that this will go well, but the folks at the Anti-Real World DC might be even more hostile to the show than I am… and that’s saying something!  Nevertheless, it’s certainly a site I’ll be watching for the next several months.

James L. Brooks has also been shooting a not-yet-titled film in the District lately, and today they were shooting a block down the street.  I managed to get a few pictures of Jack Nicholson and Paul Rudd filming a scene.

Finally, I went to move my car the other day only to find myself blocked in by folks shooting a webisode of Orange Juice in Bishop’s Garden.  I had never heard of the show before and I still haven’t gotten around to checking it out, but they were nice enough and they fit the filming theme, so I’ll give ‘em a plug…

This summer, MTV will be filming a season of the most vapid and pointless of all reality television shows, “The Real World” in DC. Ever since the news hit the streets, speculation has abounded as to where in DC the cast would live. Would they be in Georgetown? Adams Morgan? Columbia Heights? Over the weekend, the question was apparently answered… and much to my chagrin, they’ll be directly across the street from my apartment.  Anyone up for a two month road trip?

It was just a matter of time, but inevitably a need to express the healthy amount of loathing that I have for DC parking enforcement would be what brings me back to writing in this space. Sure enough, under DC’s draconian parking enforcement regime, it was just last week when the powers that be gave me the fodder for a shiny new blog post.

It was Wednesday morning and my car was parked on a street with a Wednesday street cleaning.  I was running late and saw that the street sweeper had *just* gone past my car.  Since DC recently equipped its street sweepers with cameras to identify parking violations, I knew I already had a ticket in the mail.   At this point, I kicked myself, but I also figured the damage was already done, right? Right…

Thursday afternoon – about 30 hours later – I went back to take my car for its annual DC inspection… and that’s where the fun begins. You see, when I went back to retrieve my car… it wasn’t there.

Now, it should be noted that DC also occasionally tows cars that have been ticketed.  Cars aren’t towed as a punitive measure… they’re simply towed so that the street can be clear for whatever purpose originally prompted the parking restriction.  Cars aren’t even towed to an impound lot – they’re towed to available nearby street parking.  However, I had never seen a car towed in my neighborhood for a street cleaning violation and since the street sweeper had already come by, what would be the point?

I ran back up to my apartment and checked the DC DMV’s website, and it told me that my car had not been towed.  Ugh…  Now I’m wondering which is more likely:  that my car was stolen or that the DMV is wrong.  Despite the prevalence of car theft problems in my area, DMV screwups are much more frequent.  I called the phone number on the website… and that’s when I found out that my car was, in fact, towed to a spot about five blocks from my apartment… ugh.

So I hurry over to my car, still hoping to make my inspection appointment.  When I get there, I find two tickets.  One was the expected parking ticket for the Wednesday street cleaning violation.  The other was a second street cleaning violation… issued on Thursday… at a location three blocks away.  Which is to say that my car wasn’t just towed once, but that it was actually moved to a place where I would get a second parking ticket (less than 24 hours after the first) and then moved again!  (and neither was in the DMV’s computer system yet)

But wait… there’s more!  The tickets that were on my windshield were written by a parking enforcement officer.   A week or so later, I receive two additional parking tickets, courtesy of the street sweepers!  They’re basically identical to the two tickets that were on my car, only issued a few minutes earlier or later.  So because I was running late one morning, a simple street cleaning violation (unpleasant, but acceptable) managed to balloon into a series of tickets costing me quadruple the “bargained” price… and all because DC wants to fill a budget hole.

And for the cherry on top, I had to get my car inspected the next morning, when I found out that having an appointment did little to actually save me time over the folks with no appointment… and confirmed my memory that when DC inspects your car, they don’t actually bother to look under the hood of your car!  How exactly is that an inspection?!?  But that’s a whole ‘nother matter…

Two awesome new features from Google Maps for those looking to navigate DC made their debut last week. First was the long-awaited street view feature, which allows you to see actual images of what a given place (ie: my old apartment) looks like from the street.

Google also added a neat little feature that lets you search for directions including public transit. The car/walk/transit toggle is right below the address inputs on the directions screen or you can just go to the Google Transit homepage, which lists all of the municipalities where the service is available. Sweet!

Via DCist comes this tool from Homethinking designed to tell a user what neighborhood in a new city is comparable to places in a more familiar locale. Looking at the two cities I’m most familiar with (DC and Pittsburgh), the tool seems to be rather hit-and-miss. Off the top of my head, here are a few parallels I would draw between the two cities… I’d offer explanations, but by the time I wrote those, it would probably be next month:

• Georgetown = Shadyside
• Columbia Heights = East Liberty
• Friendship = Mount Pleasant
• Adams Morgan = Strip District
• U Street = South Side Flats
• SW Waterfront = North Shore
• Tenleytown = Oakland
• Cleveland Park = North Oakland
• Capitol Hill = Highland Park
• Logan Park = Central Lawrenceville
• Shaw = Upper Lawrenceville
• Glover Park = Regent Square
• Burlieth = Point Breeze
• West End = Squirrel Hill North
• Dupont Circle = Squirrel Hill South
• Chinatown = Lower Hill District

I have a few other ideas, but they’re for neighborhoods I don’t know quite as well… anyone care to offer additional suggestions?